always check check
If you want me to continue with this very interesting tale you will have to hold back those judgmental stares and the SMHs about the ‘non-virgin’ statement. That’s much better, now let me explain
With the 24 voice:
“The following conversation took place on 27th April, 2011 between 7.00 pm and 10.00 pm”
My sister and her 5 year old daughter were at my place for no apparent reason other than she is a nice person who visits, unlike me. So her daughter starts humming the tune of that always check check song; it was hilarious actually coz when we noticed she proceeded to do the entire dance for us, I kid you not, I have just watched it on you tube and the girl has mastered all the moves. I did mention that she is 5, an age at which the only dance I knew had a lot of holding my waist and fore head, clapping and switching hands.
Big sis left us and went to search for a bite in the kitchen, (am such a bad host)
Niece: … check check every day I check..
Me: do you know what that song is about?
Niece: yeah, always
Me: what’s always for?
Niece: for big girls who are not virgins
Me: (silently laughing) are you a virgin?
Niece: no!
Me: (almost passing out) how come?
Niece: because I have a boyfriend
At this point I didn’t know whether to call my sister to the rescue or find the demon-boy that was fucking a 5 year old, but from the innocence on her face I decided to just clarify
Me: how did you stop being a virgin?
Niece: I got married to my boyfriend
Me: (still in shock) and?
Niece: that’s it. Married people can’t be virgins
Me: so what else do you do with your boyfriend?
Niece: we sit together in class, and we play and eat and draw… and when I get bigger he is going to kiss me, but don’t tell mum
Me: (with a sigh of relief) so do you use always?
Niece: no, I am not a big girl yet
do you use always?
Me: yes
Niece:so you're not a virgin?
Me: (confused) ask you're mum
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