the whizz banger

Whizz banger… has a sort of sexy ring to it, don’t you agree?

A whizz-bang is the term that Sheila and I use to refer to a quickie, and also happens to be the name of a cocktail. Yeah! For me

It all started some day when we were cleaning out Sheila’s room and stumbled on some old comics, that marked the end of cleaning time and the beginning of comic reading time. Trust Sheila to turn an innocent act like that into sex talk… 

Sheila: if Billy whizz is so fast that you can barely see him pass by, I wonder how good he would be at sushi (sex)

Me: obviously too fast, you would barely feel him in there

Sheila: I disagree, I bet it would be mind blowing, the intervals between your orgasms would be shrunk to milliseconds and you would end up with one major rocketing experience, I think from now on I am going to start fantasizing about Billy whizz banging me

Me: guys who come too fast should use you to market for them… “One time only, whizz bang,”

                … And hence began the whizz-bang, now we just use it to make fun of guys who come too fast or to refer to quickies.

So yesterday the boyfriend and I had a 407 whizz-bang, it was the fastest quickie I have ever been a part of, I swear I’m not even sure it all got in there. 

He was in, he jeezed and he was out.

I am not complaining, I am just shocked, I have been having sushi with this man for a while and it’s never been that fast. Nigga must have really missed my sugar. As soon as I was in the door he groped me with an urgency that meant “strip or I will fuck you through your clothes,( I don’t even think he noticed the grannies and the hairy legs) and at least now I don’t think he cheated on me, which is just sad coz I was busy picking up used condoms from my bedroom floor when he was missing me. (I belong in hell)

Afterwards we just lay there and did the talking thing, the rare moments when the boyfriend and I are nice to each other, there were tears and apologizing and promising not to hurt each other again.

I almost feel guilty, but unlike those very dumb-ass movie characters am not half as stupid as to admit that I cheated on him just a day ago, I will just let it go. I will let karma run its course, maybe I will get cheated on eventually or better still, maybe my transgression is karma getting back at him for a past sin (comforting thought)

PS: I am just about to call Sheila and tell her all about my whizz-bang and my night with Peter. I might use the good news-bad news approach, maybe then she wont be so mad at me for cheating.

have a great day loves.